week 12a

Today in class we had an hour and half to start blocking in our pages for the comic. Some things that we were told to keep in mind where, room for word balloons, Dynamic camera angles, and interesting compositions

Page 1 v1

I’m not happy with the first three panels just showing the eyes, they’re floating and flat. Also there is no place to show the dialogue. I’m not super happy about the ceiling tiles either.

Page 1 v2

I shifted the head to the side in P1 and this helped give a place for the word balloon and establish the character earlier. I also made P2 and P3 show Arnold's head and this helped add more action to when he looks around. I’m still not happy with the ceiling tiles and I tried to move Arnold to the left in the last panel but I don’t think this works. It’s better to read over to him.

Page 1 v3

Started but abandoned after talking to pannofino

Page 1 v4           

After talking with Pannofino I decide to move the first 5 panels up to the top third of the page. This compresses the action when Arnold first wakes up and adds more of a sense of drama. Also by putting the panels where Arnold is looking around in between the ceiling tiles and and the watch help balance things out. The 6th panel now dominates the page and gives more of an impact to Arnold being tied up in the chair.

Page 2 v1

For my first version of the second page I just started with getting things down to see what they looked like. I’m a bit worried that the panel with John in the doorway will be read incorrectly since it has two panels to the left of it. Also the panel layout feels a little bland so I might try to spice it up a bit.    

Week 11B

Today in class we started out by having the people in our row look at the scripts we wrote for today. One really good idea I got from everyone was to exaggerate how dirty the water is in the panel where the knife is in a puddle. They said it’d be okay to go over the top here and have the water be bubbling, and maybe even a dead rat is partially in the puddle. After we met with our group we took turns partnering up with people and drawing each other's characters.  A good idea that came from this was that John is wearing a butcher’s apron. From there it evolved to Arnold being held in the back of a butcher’s shop instead of a generic ruined building, and now the knife might be a clever in a puddle of blood instead of dirty water. I found that describing Arnold to other people really helped me get a better feeling for him, even if their drawings weren’t quite what I pictured. Here are the drawing from my classmates:



After drawing the characters we started making revisions to our scripts. 

Week 10a

Today in class we started off with an exercise in which we made a 16 panel comic. To do it we made up 16 plank panel and then drew a first and last panel. Then we split into two groups and passed the comic to the right. We would have two minutes to draw the next panel and then pass the comic. At first it was easy to come up with something to do next, but as you approached the end you had to think about how you would get the comic to that last panel. I had one tough challenge where I had one panel to tale the story from a hot dog factory to a large speech by a nice looking man.

After we finished that exercise we played Mangaka, My group was Vance, Kyle and Max. Vance and I ended up tying with 29 points at the end. Our theme cards for this game were Cyborgs, School Clubs, and Super human skill at a Mundane thing. So most of my comics involved the Cyborg Club and the punch line would involve some lame power. This game is always super challenging, but I definitely feel like it was easier than last time we played it, but this time some of my cards felt like they worked better together.

Week 11 out of class

This week out of class I had to choose a section of my narrative and write a script for it. I decided to do the section where Arnold is first waking up and meets John Turner. I thought this would be a good section to just jump into since it's a transition and you don’t really need to know what happens before it. Also I thought it would be fun to play with the tension of him being tied up in the chair.


Page 10

PANEL 1: ECU tight shot on arnold's eyes as they are partially opening as he wakes up. HE is very groggy and his eyes won’t be focused.

Arnold: UGGHH,

PANEL 2: ECU thin panel about half the size of panel 1. Arnold’s eyes glance up and to the left

PANEL 3 ECU Same size as panel 2. Arnolds eyes glance quickly over to the right.

Arnold: Where am I?

PANEL 4:  Worm’s eye View of the ceiling. The ceiling is made up of numerous dirty and awfully stained ceiling tiles that look like they’ve been neglected for years. Some of the tiles are completely missing and loose wires dangle from the openings. A couple of dark pipes with chipped paint come down through.

Arnold: These disgusting ceiling tiles aren’t the lovely eggshell plaster ceiling that I’m used to seeing in the morning...

Panel 5: ECU very tight shot on a digital watch face where only the watch face is visible. The time shown is 11:15 PM. The watch is well used, but loved. Slightly scuffed up and has one or two scratches on the screen.

Arnold: ... Cripes, It's not the morning. It isn’t even past midnight!

PANEL 6: Establishing shot of INT. Arnold is sat tied to an old wooden chair positioned on the right third of the panel. The chair is of medium size, not too fancy, and the kind that would be for a dinner table.  The room is an old office that has been abandoned for a long time and is illuminated by a lamp on the floor in front of Arnold. This cause a long shadow to be cast on the floor and the wall behind Arnold. Several other trash esq items are on the floor casting shadows. The room an average ceiling height for an office and several chairs and desks are stacked on the left hand wall in the FG. Arnold is wearing a two piece PJ suit with a repeating pattern of leaping sheep. The top buttons down with long sleeves, and the bottoms are just a little too short for him.

Arnold: Clearly something is wrong here (Staring directly out at the viewer)

Page 11

PANEL 1 Worm’s eye POV of Arnold from the waist up. Arnold is trying the glance behind him as a loud creak is coming from that direction. Arnold isn’t panicking he’s calling out in a loud and clear voice.  The dirty ceiling tiles are slightly visible above his head but not enough to be distracting. The area behind Arnold is cast in strong shadow.

Arnold: Hello? Who’s there?

spx : creeeeeaaaak

PANEL 2  FS of an open doorway. Standing in the door is a man wearing grey trousers and an oversized flannel shirt. The man is cut in half in about a 30 degree angle sloping up to the right by a strong shadow from the doorway so that only below his waist is visible in the light. Everything else is silhouetted.

John: Hello there Arnold, Who I am doesn’t matter to you right now...

Arnold : Got it!

John: um excuse me?

PANEL 3 Shoulder up shot of arnold’s head. He’s looking very smug with his eyes closed and a slight smile on his face as he talks. BG is solid black to focus on Arnold and his face.

Arnold: You’re John Turner who had ten hostages held up in the quickie clean laundromat on the corner of  Nuebry and State Street eight years ago ...

PANEL 4 This a long panel with Arnold positioned on the left hand side. He’s still making the same face as he continues to talk.

Arnold: I remember it was a clear sunny day except for a few clouds off to the west. I think you were arrested and given about 7 years time. That must mean this is your terrible revenge upon me. Let’s see hmmm, That’s right you have a mother named Mary-ann who’s all alone in Manhattan. Who’s birthday is on june 14th. Would you look at that it’s June 14th today what a funny coincidence John ...

John : (from off panel and so that his bubble overlaps the end of Arnold’s cutting him off) Crap!

PANEL 5 American Shot of John and Arnold in the room. John is on the left while arnold is on the right. John is smacking himself on the forehead he doesn’t notice that his knife falls out of his pocket. Arnold is looking up at him concerned.

John: I can’t believe I forgot that Mom’s birthday was today. Geez she’s gonna be so heartbroken that I abandoned her.

Arnold: Well if you left now you could probably get a small present and make it to her apartment before midnight.

Page 12

PANEL 1 Eye level shot of John running out of the door, he’s already mostly through the door so only his legs are visible. He calling out over his shoulder back towards arnold so the speech bubble will being coming out of the doorway.  

John: You’re right! Thanks Arnold, now stay right there for a bit.

Panel 2 shot of Arnold from Mid chest up looking smugly off to the left (the panel where john left the room) Dark BG not to distract from face.

Arnold: Ha! The fool left his knife on the floor getting out of here will be supremely easy.

PANEL 3 Large wide panel, Worms eye view of the knife laying in a small puddle. The knife is in the foreground and Arnold is in the BG and distorted by forced perspective he has a horrified look upon his face. The room is also showing extremes of perspective.

Spx: gasp!

PANEL 4 CU of Arnold's face, he looks incredibly stressed out, far more than he should be for the knife just being in a puddle. Maybe some sweat is rolling down the side of his face.

Arnold: Standing water! I can’t possible get the knife from there. Drinking or coming in contact with standing water is an extremely easy way to catch all sorts of diseases.

PANEL 5 FS of Arnold  in his chair. His face is screwed up tight and he is clearly thinking incredible hard. Maybe some action lines are coming in from the edged of the panel to make it more dramatic.  

Arnold: Thinking!

Also out of class this week I worked on developing characters and scenes for the comic.

Arnold:

Arnold is a middle aged man who is slightly balding and a little gangly. I decided to make him tall so that he’d look weird tied up in the chair. This will really emphasis how out of place he is. Also he is in his PJ's to again make him look out of place.

John Turner

John Turner is a large stout man. Although the comic is modern I decided to give him the look of an old fashioned gangster. This will hopefully help make people see him as a bad guy even though I don’t give him much back story

Jane Rogers

Average middle aged white woman. Blond hair with a bit of a funky cut so that she’ll stand out. She’s wearing a sweater because I love to make people wear sweaters. Also it hides her body desexualizing her a bit. I thought that her and Arnold need a relationship built on helping each other emotionally.

Mary-ann Turner

Old lady with a similar build to John Turner

Scenes:

Butcher shop interior where Arnold will be tied up.

Shot of the ceiling tiles from when arnold is first waking up

Butcher shop exterior, I'm not very happy with this one so I would definitely rework it if I were to include it into the comic.

Week 11a

Today in class we started out with doing a peer review of the 900 word narratives we had to write the other day. My group consisted of Jon Manos, Jianzhu Ba, and Roy Engle. The feedback I got mostly consisted of a couple questions that required some clarification, for instance the timeline of when John Turner was in jail was confusing to Roy. So I changed up some of the dialogue in the script to clarify this.  

Some of the feedback I received:

Some feedback I gave Roy:

After doing the peer reviews we had a short lecture that explained script writing and the format for doing it. Then we had in class work time to start working on our own scripts. I choose to so my 3-5 pages in the middle of the narrative because that’s where I felt that the most action was. The intro was mostly set-up and the end was just wrapping everything up. After starting on the script it seems that my comic pages will only cover Arnold being kidnapped, Talking to his captor, and then starting to escape. I’m being careful to be very descriptive of the settings so that in theory somebody else could pick up the script and at least make something close to what I’m picturing. Here’s my script so far:

Page 10

PANEL 1: ECU tight shot on arnold's eyes as they are partially opening as he wakes up. HE is very groggy and his eyes won’t be focused.

Arnold: UGGHH,

PANEL 2: ECU thin panel about half the size of panel 1. Arnold’s eyes glance up and to the left

PANEL 3 ECU Same size as panel 2. Arnolds eyes glance quickly over to the right.

Arnold: Where am I?

PANEL 4:  Worm’s eye View of the ceiling. The ceiling is made up of numerous dirty and awfully stained ceiling tiles that look like they’ve been neglected for years. Some of the tiles are completely missing and loose wires dangle from the openings. A couple of dark pipes with chipped paint come down through.

Arnold: These disgusting ceiling tiles aren’t the lovely eggshell plaster ceiling that I’m used to seeing in the morning...

Panel 5: ECU very tight shot on a digital watch face where only the watch face is visible. The time shown is 11:45 PM. The watch is well used, but loved. Slightly scuffed up and has one or two scratches on the screen.

Arnold: ... Cripes, It's not the morning. It isn’t even past midnight!

PANEL 6: Establishing shot of INT. Arnold is sat tied to an old wooden chair positioned on the right third of the panel. The chair is of medium size, not too fancy, and the kind that would be for a dinner table.  The room is an old office that has been abandoned for a long time and is illuminated by a lamp on the floor in front of Arnold. This cause a long shadow to be cast on the floor and the wall behind Arnold. Several other trash esq items are on the floor casting shadows. The room an average ceiling height for an office and several chairs and desks are stacked on the left hand wall in the FG. Arnold is wearing a two piece PJ suit with a repeating pattern of leaping sheep. The top buttons down with long sleeves, and the bottoms are just a little too short for him.

Arnold: Clearly something is wrong here (Staring directly out at the viewer)

Page 11

PANEL 1 Worm’s eye POV of Arnold from the waist up. Arnold is trying the glance behind him as a loud creak is coming from that direction. Arnold isn’t panicking he’s calling out in a loud and clear voice.  The dirty ceiling tiles are slightly visible above his head but not enough to be distracting. The area behind Arnold is cast in strong shadow.

Arnold: Hello? Who’s there?

spx : creeeeeaaaak

PANEL 2  FS of an open doorway. Standing in the door is a man wearing grey trousers and an oversized flannel shirt. The man is cut in half in about a 30 degree angle sloping up to the right by a strong shadow from the doorway so that only below his waist is visible in the light. Everything else is silhouetted.

John: Hello there Arnold, Who I am doesn’t matter to you right now...

Arnold : Got it!

John: um excuse me?

PANEL 3 Shoulder up shot of arnold’s head. He’s looking very smug with his eyes closed and a slight smile on his face as he talks. BG is solid black to focus on Arnold and his face.

Arnold: You’re John Turner who had ten hostages held up in the quickie clean laundromat on the corner of  Nuebry and State Street eight years ago ...

PANEL 4 This a long panel with Arnold positioned on the left hand side. He’s still making the same face as he continues to talk.

Week 10 out of class

This week out of class we had to read chapter six of Scott Mccloud's understanding comics and write a 900 word narrative using the prompt we received in class on wednesday. This is what I came up with for “The night before the wedding a hypochondriac hostage negotiator wakes up in a strange house”.

Arnold Hostettler was a top notch hostage negotiator for the NYPD. A super genius who could read people and situations in a second and understand everything about them. From what their inseam was, too why their parents were disappointed in them. Arnold's one drawback was that he was incredibly hypochondriac, and therefore an extreme germaphobe. He was so incredibly scared of germs that he once walked 10 blocks around Manhattan to get too Chummy Bagel (the only bagel shop he’s ever been to) because he saw a man sneeze in front of him on the sidewalk. After quitting out of Harvard Law because he was disgusted with the sleazy and corrupt world of lawyers. Arnold decided to join the NYPD and use his gift for the good of the city. As a hostage negotiator Arnold was able to talk hundreds of bad guys into releasing their hostages safely. Arnold never lost a single hostage except for one. For years this lost soul haunted Arnolds dreams and he just didn’t have the strength to forgive himself. Arnold was married to the job and his loneliness and guilt lead him to a place of despair, until he met Jane Rogers. Jane worked as a manager at Chummy Bagel and through Arnold's regular visits they became familiar with each other until one day Jane asked him out on a date. Their relationship blossomed and Arnold began to feel better about himself and life. He was a new man after his depression. Jane and Arnold decided that they should get married, and after months of planning and waiting Arnold went to bed alone in his tiny brooklyn apartment the night before the wedding.  

When Arnold wakes up he realizes right away that the horribly stained ceiling tiles above his head aren’t the lovely eggshell plaster ceiling he is used to seeing in the morning, and on top of that it isn’t even the morning It’s only 11:45! The second clue that something wasn’t right was that he is tied to a chair instead of wrapped up in the cozy blankets on his bed. Taking stock of the situation Arnold surmises that he has been kidnapped. As Arnold is looking for a way to escape his bonds a man in a balaclava walks in.

The man begins to talk, but Arnold interrupts him, identifying him by name Arnold asks that the man release him. Taken completely by surprise the man asks Arnold how he identified him so quickly. Arnold states that he is clearly John Turner who had five hostages in the quickie clean laundromat on the corner of  Nuebry and State Street. Having talked on the phone with him for several hours Arnold had memorized his voice and everything he could about Mr. Turner. In the end Arnold had successfully negotiated him out of the laundromat where he was arrested and sent to Rikers for eight years. Arnold realized now that John Turner must have been released earlier this year and this was clearly some sort of attempt at revenge. Accesing his vast memory Arnold remembers that John Turner has mother named Mary-ann Turner who lives alone in Manhattan, and of all days today is her birthday! Clearly Mr. Turner has forgotten this so Arnold reminds him. Overcome with guilt about forgetting his own mother's birthday John runs out quickly go buy a present and visit her. In his rush he doesn’t notice that a knife falls out of his pocket.

Now left alone in the room Arnold attempts to get to the knife, but there is one problem. It's In a puddle of standing water! Arnold knows that coming in contact with standing water is a sure way to catch all sorts of diseases. Try as he might he just can't bring himself to touch that hell water. Instead he starts to rub his bonds against the chair and starts to create friction. After four hours of rubbing he builds up enough heat to start a small fire and his bindings burn apart. Now he is out of the chair and he quickly takes of his jacket and uses it to open the door handle only to find a steam vent shooting out right on the other side. Arnold can’t possibly walk through that! Who knows what awful airborne illnesses might be in that steam. Instead he goes back into the room and examines the windows. He’s about three stories up, and there is a dumpster full of old dirty mattresses right below him, but that's simply not an option. Who knows what has happened on those mattresses. Arnold manages to climb out the window and perilously gets over to the fire escape twenty windows away. Successfully climbing down it without actually touching it Arnold escapes free into the night.

Arnold hails a cab only to realize that John Turner took his wallet to buy his mother a present. So Arnold begins the long walk to his marriage venue. Arriving five minutes late Arnold sprints into the chapel completely out of breath, just as everyone is starting to worry. After everything settles down and Arnold explains what happens he and Jane are married and drive off to their honeymoon upstate. Meanwhile John Turner and his Mother share a lovely breakfast at their local dinner catching up after these eight years. Then we flash to the prison where we see a man sitting in a cell, “who is this mystery prisoner?”

Week 10b

Today in class we introduced the final assignment. We need to create a 3-5 page comic using the prompt we received from the story generator book. The Book is three sections of page and you flip the three sections and it creates a story for you. Here are the two I received:

I’m going to do the second prompt “the night before the wedding a hypochondriac hostage negotiator wakes up in a strange house”. After we received the prompts we met with three different students and discussed and expanded the ideas. When we finished with that had in class work time to work on a 900 word narrative from the prompt. Here are my notes from the meetings:

This is what I’ve written for the narrative so far:

Arnold Hostettler was a top notch hostage negotiator for the NYPD. A super genius who could read people and situations in a second and understand everything about them. From what their inseam is, too why their parents are disappointed in them. Arnold's one draw back was that he was incredibly hypochondriac, and therefore an extreme germaphobe. He was so incredibly scared of germs that he once walked 10 blocks around Manhattan to get to Chummy Bagel (the only bagel shop he’s ever been to) because he saw a man sneeze in front of him on the sidewalk. After quitting out of Harvard Law because he was disgusted with the sleezy and corrupt world of lawyers, Arnold decided to join the NYPD and use his gift for the good of the city. As a hostage negotiator Arnold was able to talk hundreds of bad guys into releasing their hostages safely. Arnold never lost a single hostage except for one. For years this lost soul huanted Arnolds dreams and he just didn’t have the strength to forgive himself. Aronld was married to the job and his lonelness and guilt lead him to a place of dispair, until he met Jane Rogers. Jane worked as a manager at Chummy Bagel and through Anolds regular visits they became familier with each other until one day Jane asked him out on a date. Their relationship blossemed and Arnold began to feel better about himself and life. He was a new man after his depresson. Jane and Arnold decided that they should get married, and after months of planning and waiting Arnold went to bed alone in his tiny brooklyn apartment the night before the wedding.  

When Arnold woke up he realized right away that the horribly stained ceiling tiles above his head weren’t the lovely eggshell plaster ceiling he was used to seeing in the morning, and on top of that it wasn’t even the morning It was only 11:45! The second clue that something wasn’t right was that he was tied to a chair instead of wrapped up in the cozy blankets on his bed. Taking stock of the situation Arnold surmised that he had been kidnapped. As Arnold was looking for a way to escape his bonds a man in a balaclave walked in.

The man begins to talk but Arnold interrupts him identifying him by name Arnold asks that the man release him.